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Destination Unknown 2005 ad.

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WORLD NEARS END

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Mooks start recording next album

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The Mooks have declined to accept defeat in the latest set back in their illustrious career.

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BRUNSWICK, MELBOURNE: The Mooks have set their sights on the possible 2006 release of their follow up to 'Never Gets You Anywhere' following their shock rejection from the line up on AMPLIFIED: Sounds from Tasmania compilation and Tim Flannery's gloomy predictions on the fate of the Planet. "The Mooks don't have to worry about a f**g thing", said skeptical Herald Sun journalist Andrew Bolt in an exclusive interview on the ABC.

"You can bring on Dropdragon, Jay Hanson Trio, Dean Stevenson, The Dead Abigails, Waiter, Fell to Erin, Enola Fall, Geoff Allan, Unleash the Nugget, The Innocents, Pete Cornelius, Tonewheel, The Pumpkin Heads, Lakoda, The Styles, Stand Defiant, Zero Degrees Freedom , The Fat Band, Holloway Street, Red Hot Roosters, Ajak Kwai, Sir Veto, Shane Pullen, Jodi Haines, Fabio Chivhanda, Flypheonix, Justin Heazlewood, Roman Astra, The Anita George Band, Astrid Notarangelo, Conn O’Neil, Shemozzle, The Gilmour Ensemble, The Tom Vincent, Billy Whitton , I don't care who you bring on daddy, they're all going under the thunder of the Mooks", band spokesperson UMOOKU said in a rare public appearance.

In a true display of magnanimity the Mooks have declined to bag these artist's efforts online for at least 12 months. However UMOOKU's blitherings have once again been dismissed as 'irrelevant' by former P.M. Robert Hawke. "He should give up on the greens and get some shares in depleted uranium stocks." he said live from Tiananmen Square as he helped organise the olympics.

In an unrelated but equally disturbing story A.L.P. ladder hack Peter Garret, stole the march on the allegedly slothful Mooks yesterday by giving up on life all together. "Now that he's in Canberra he's just rolled over and died", said an irate punter at the Mook's favourite watering hole. "I put me copy of 'ed injuries in the recycling I did ...". Rumours that Mr Garret was forming a new band with Innocent Charles Tauber have been silenced by his press agent.

However in an unexpected act of defiance the Mook's hit back with this (leaked) email and stuck it to the man.

Dear Jam [itupyoura**] *s
What I would like to know is why Hey Mook were not considered for the Amplified compilation cd?
We have produced more original music in the last three years than any act on your radar and have been part of the Hobart music "scene" for nearly 20 years... writing, recording and releasing original music when there was ZERO support for local original music- it seems for us this will always be the case!
The last two albums by the band have received glowing reviews. Please see the attachment.
Our last album was an Edge Radio recommended disc so they seemed to think it was OK and I still occasionally hear songs by the band being played on Edge.
If it wasn't for these independent reviews I would at least know that we weren't part of your project because we were total shit....
We are paid up members of Tas Music but received no notification from them about the Amplified project.
Thanks for your non-assistance and lack of support
Simon Cr**cksh*nk

As for the Mook's future in the world of economic reality and "the music industry" a chance encounter with a pal of bigwig tycoon Packer may provide a clue. "You're f**d mate", said actor and ocassional muso, Russell Crowe, as he laid it on the line later that evening while The Mooks gathered for a post practice drink at a well known haunt for arts try hards and other hanger ons. A long time member of the band was later quoted as saying "I don't give a flying f**k about John Howard's sedition laws, I'll say whatever I want, whenever I want, next time you get arrested don't get caught wearing a naff jacket".